Cullen Karaoke
by xoier118
Summary: An innocent game of Karaoke turns into a battle of the songs... R&R! plz!
1. Chapter 1

CULLEN KARAOKE

**An innocent game of karaoke turns into a battle of the songs….**

BPOV

Alice came bouncing down the stairs excitedly. I was wondering how she could be so hyper at 10:00pm on a Friday.

But then I realized that of course she was a vampire, she doesn't get tired… duh!!

"im bored so we're gonna do some karaoke!! Okay? OKAY!!!" she told us so qickly I barely cought it.

Before anyone could object she already had all the stuff set up and was pushing emmet up to sing.

Emmet didn't seem to have any objection to this. He walked willingly up with a huge grin on his face.

"wait" I interrupted. " I m making a rule that all you guys have to imitate the singers actual voice. No singing with your amazing voices that would only make me feel worse about mine…" I stated, but then added quickly, " not that im gonna sing or anything!!"

"pssh! Of course your gonna sing Bella!! That's the whole reason im doing this so willingly. I want to get everyone out of the way so you can sing." Emmet grinned at me evilly .

I groaned and slouched down in my seat next to Edward.

"you have an amazing voice Bella" Edward told me quietly as he kissed the top of my head.

I just snorted and prepared to listen to Emmet sing.

He browsed through song after song looking for a good one. ( AN: I have no clue how karaoke works so if I get this wrong that's why)

" HELLO WISCONSIN!!!!! I. AM. EMMET!!!!!" he boomed into the microphone, making it screech horribly. There was a collective wince in the room as it reached our ears.

" Emmet dear? We live in Forks, Washington. That's nowhere near Wisconsin" esme said quietly in that motherly voice of hers.

Emmet continued to yell over the microphone, " I KNOW, BUT I LIKE WISCONSIN BETTER!!! SO PLEASE JUST LET ME SING MY SONG!!!"

Esme raised her eyebrows at him in an extraordinarily scary expression. " Excuse me?"

" i… um.. mean… PLEASE!!!" he corrected himself and smiled at his 'mother'.

Then without further ado he played his song. I recognized Headstrong by Trapt blaring through the speakers. How I knew a song like THAT I do not know.

Circling your, circling your, circling your head,  
Contemplating everything you ever said  
Now I see the truth, I got doubt  
A different motive in your eyes and now I'm out  
See you later  
I see your fantasy, You want to make it a reality paved in gold  
See inside, Inside of our heads (yeah)  
Well now that's over  
I see your motives inside, decisions to hide

Back off I'll take you on!!  
Headstrong to take on anyone  
I know that you are wrong  
Headstrong we're Headstrong  
Back off I'll take you on  
Headstrong to take on anyone  
I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong  
I can't give everything away  
I won't give everything away

you know the more I think of it the more I can see this as Emmet's theme song....

He continued on for the whole song and by the end i think i was just about deaf, I swear my ears were bleeding. but then again no one was trying to kill me so maybe they weren't .

Alice made Rose go up next. She was a little more reluctant than Emmet was.

She searched for a song for about 8 mintues. How long does it take?!

She FINALLY found one and pressed play. And what I heard made the whole rooms' mouths drop open.

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

(uu-oooh-u)

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)

Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please  
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees  
Come jump in, bimbo friend, let us do it again,  
hit the town, fool around, let's go party  
You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"  
You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"..............

Wow you would think Rose would have a bit more class than that. The room was mostly silent excecpt for EMmmet hooting and 'whooo-ing'.

Rosalie blew him a kiss and walked off the "stage".

"Alright" Alice muttered breaking the awkward silence, " on that disturbing note, Jasper!! Its your turn!!"

Alice shoved him up to the front, him grumbling the whole way, and forced him to sing. With a sigh, Jasper began looking through the song choices.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: ok I forgot to write this for the first chapter but I'm writing it now; I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT.**

**I would like to thank my first reviewers!! you guys really made me want to continue this soo... thanx again !!**

**BPOV**

Jasper sighed again and adjusted the microphone stand. He took a few minutes making sure it was at the right height.

Alice cleared her throat, annoyed with his stalling and shot him a sing-or-die look.

Jasper flinched and started his song.

"umm… hi, I guess its.. my.. turn so, this is Mr. sensitive by …um… David Cook." He said nervously. It's was strange seeing jasper nervous he's usually the one who is going along with all of emmet's stupid tricks. Man, you think you know a person.

_Day in and day out.  
Watch them scream watch them shout.  
Through the silence.  
Through the silence.  
Give them ears give them lies.  
Gives them point to the cries.  
Oh the violence  
Oh the violence  
Hear them scream your name…_

After Jasper sang that, Emmet screamed," JASPER!!!" jasper shot him a glare and continued.

_  
I would like to introduce Mr. Sensitive  
The one who never let the worst  
Get the best of him  
Get the best of him_

_  
This city feels low  
It gives the gleam and the glow  
Of his diligence to their elegance.  
Just feel anger feel pain.  
Feel the sun and rain  
Just feel something.  
Oh just feel something.  
Hear them scream your name._  
_I would like to introduce Mr. Sensitive_

The one who never let the worst  
Get the best of him

Suddenly he broke out an electric blue electric guitar and started playing along with the song.

_They throw the stones at bricks and bones.  
He didn't stand a chance they said.  
Little boy the world is over.  
Ignorance is bliss._

He then did an awesome guitar solo that only professionals should learn how to do. He started doing awesome dance moves, while playing guitar and just put any human who has tried to look cool while playing a guitar to shame.

_I would like to introduce Mr. Sensitive.  
The one who never lets the worst  
Get the best of him.  
I would like to introduce Mr. Sensitive.  
The one who never left the worst  
Get the best of him.  
Get the best of him._

He ended with one final strum on the guitar and then placed it back on its stand and walked off.

The room was silent for a few minutes, while Jasper took his seat and looked around at the rest of us, like nothing happened.

Then the whole room erupted in applause. Alice jumped up and kissed him swiftly and Emmet boomed with praise for his talented brother.

"Yea, Man!!! That's what I'm talking about!! WOOO!!!" Emmet yelled, clapping his enormous bear paws he calls hands.

Jasper just smiled and nodded towards Alice for her to go ahead.

She pranced up and lowered the microphone as low as it could go.

I made the mistake of snickering and she shot me a glare.

But at least I didn't full out laugh like Emmet.

He boomed out laughter.

Alice must have had enough with the short jokes for one night because she pounced at him. She punched his back and scratched him but he was to busy laughing to notice.

The rest of us were staring dumbfounded at the scene before us.

Let me describe it for you. Okay first of all, little tiny Alice was screeching and punching HUGE Emmet, who was laughing hysterically and trying to get her off of him. Rather humorous.

Finally, Alice jumped off of him, walked up to the "stage", smoothed her hair and started looking for her song.

She found one and was about to sing but then froze and ran up the stairs. She came back wearing a red salsa dress. Oh-boy.

She pushed play...

_Tell me something I don't know_**(AN: okay this song goes on for a looong time, so I had to cut it short by… a lot.)**_  
_

Everybody tells me that it's so hard to make it  
It's so hard to break yeah  
There's no way to fake it  
Everybody tells me that it's wrong what I'm feeling  
I shouldn't believe in  
The dreams that I'm dreaming

I hear it everyday  
I hear it all the time  
I'm never gonna amount too much but they're never gonna change my mind  
Oh

Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know, something I don't know, something I don't know

How many inches in a mile  
What it takes to make you smile  
Betcha not to treat me like,a child baby  
Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know, something I don't know, something I don't know  
Tell me, tell me some-thing I don't know

Everybody tells me I don't know what I'm doing  
This life I'm persuing  
The odds I'd be losing  
Everybody tells me that it's one in a million  
Like one in billion  
One in a zillion

I hear it every day  
I hear it all the time  
I'm never gonna amount too much but they're never going to change my mind  
Oh

Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know, something I don't know, something I don't know [Repeat]  
How many inches in a mile  
What it takes to make you smile  
Betcha not to treat me like, a child baby  
Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know, something I don't know, something I don't know

Throughout the whole song she was dancing around the stage with a broom, like it was her partner. What was really impressive was that the broom dipped her! She managed to do all this and keep the microphone in her hand and sing, perfectly of course.

_Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know, something I don't know, something I don't know…_

The song ended and she placed the mic back on the stand, put the broom away and changed back to her regular clothes. She was sitting in her seat next to jasper in under twenty seconds.

"Yeah Alice!! You go girl!!" Rosalie told her and they shared an air-five.

" okay, Carlisle your up." Alice said.

Carlisle wandered up and cleared his throat. He took a deep, unneeded breath and began.

**did i do good? or did i fail?? dont worry the battle of the songs IS coming in later chapt.s and i do have a plot in mind, but like all stories you have to get there first so please my very few fans that i have, stick with me!! **

**And Review!!**


	3. Chapter 3

**hey all!! ok, im sorry if anyone has been waiting. but i DO have an excuse... ok #1 i was sick for a few days and i really didnt feel lik that was about a month or so ago so that brings me to #2 IM LAZY!!!!!! soo hopefully that clears things up. =] soo yea and then i didnt have any ideas and i was having a self-confidence issue.. *sniffles* ya know cuz i was thinking that there are TONS of better stories then mine so.. yea that was my issue... but it all passed so now im all better XD soo on with the story....!!**

**_Carlisle took a deep unneeded breathe and began..._**

_"I'm bringing sexy back  
Them other boys don't know how to act  
I think you're special, what's behind your back?  
So turn around and I'll pick up the slack._

_Take 'em to the bridge  
_

Oh my gosh!! CARLISLE?!?!?!? Singing ... THIS!!! oh boy. i blushed and hid my face in my hands. I looked up for a moment to see everyone else with their mouths wide open, wide-eyed. Carlilse just ignored them and continued on.

_  
Dirty babe  
You see the shackles  
Baby I'm your slave  
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave  
It's just that no one makes me feel this way_

_Take 'em to the chorus  
_He then proceeded to do the Micheal Jackson impersonation. you know the one with the "slide " and the awkward grabbing.... Some how he got a hat and white bell-bottoms while doing the...dance.  
_  
Come here girl  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
Come to the back  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
VIP  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
Drinks on me  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
Let me see what you're working with  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
Look at those hips  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
You make me smile  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
Go ahead child  
Go ahead, be gone with it  
And get your sexy on  
Go ahead, be gone with it_

_Get your sexy on_

He winked at Esme then, causing me to blush more. Who knew Carlisle had this in him....?  
_Go ahead, be gone with it. _

_Get your sexy on...._

He then got on his head and spun around, vampire style. I could barely see him, just a streak of white---both his skin and his bell-bottoms. When he was visible again, he was sitting crossed-legged with his hat cocked over his left eye. We all just stared at him like cows on milking day.

Okay.....That was awkward. He simply stared at us staring at him and got up to sit back down next to Esme. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and settled back in to his seat.

" umm.... ok.. uhh good job Carlisle. Very well ....choreographed. So .. uhh.. Esme, your turn." Alice muttered neverously.

Esme's eyes got huge and she shook her head frantically. " No, no no no no no no no..." she said with each turn of her head.

" Um, Esme its-its your turn," i told her.

"NO!!" she yelled and ran out of the room, Carlisle right after her.

Alrighty then...

"So, i guess that means that its Bella's turn!!" Alice said excitedly, while pointing at me with a long fake fingernail.

"No---" i started but was cut off.

"Bella you are not backing out of this!!!!! Its bad enough Esme did , but so help me if you back out now I'll--" she yelled but Edward stopped her.

" Sheesh, lighten up Alice!! She doesent have to sing if she doesent want to!!" he protested.

"No, No. I'll do it" I said raising my hand to signal Edward to stop protesting on my account. I'd rather sing than get totured by Alice fo rnot singing...ugh I shudder at the thought of what she could do to me....

Sighing, i walked up to the make-shift stage and started making an idiot out of myself trying to figure out how to work the cursed piece of machinery.

ALice gave an exasperated huff, and came up to help me. she scrolled while I looked for a do-able song. As soon as i saw it and decided, Alice squealed and rushed me out of the living room to her bedroom.

She was digging in her closet for something and came back with a blue and white cheer-leading outfit, with matching pom-poms. Am i the only one who wonders how or why she had this?

She didnt give me a chance to ask her-but judging by her giggle she already knew i was planning on it-- and shoved me into the bathroom.

When i was finished putting on the monstrosity, Alice dragged me down the stairs and back on the stage. Everyone froze when they saw me in the skimpy little outfit. I blushed. Hard. I mean this was like the super-nova blush. Ugh i hate Alice sometimes....

Ignoring their stares, i cleared my throat and nodded to Alice who played the song.

_Oh Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind,  
hey Mickey (huff huff), hey Mickey (huff huff)  
Oh Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind,  
hey Mickey (huff huff) hey Mickey_

Edward straightened up out his lazy position all of a sudden and sat stiffly in his seat, nostrils flared. Whats up with him??Shrugging I continued on with my song.

_  
Oh Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind,  
hey Mickey (huff huff) hey Mickey (huff huff)  
Oh Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind,  
hey Mickey (huff huff) hey Mickey_

Since I was in this outfit anyway i decided to liven things up a bit and put the pom-poms to use. I shoook them around over me head and such and tryed to look professional. I didnt dare try to do any kind of flip or anything, knowing full well what would happen if I did.

Everyone was getting pretty into it-except for Edward-- and were clapping their hands at the appropriate times.

_Hey Mickey!  
You've been around all night and that's a little long  
You think you've got the right but I think you've got it wrong  
Why can't you say goodnight so you can take me home, Mickey_

_'Cause when you say you will, it always means you won't  
You're givin' me the chills, baby, please baby don't  
Every night you still leave me all alone, Mickey_

_Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand  
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand  
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand  
It's guys like you Mickey  
Oh, what you do Mickey, do Mickey  
Don't break my heart, Mickey_

_So come on and give it to me any way you can  
Any way you wanna do it, I'll treat you like a man  
Oh please, baby, please, don't leave me in a jam, Mickey_

_Oh Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind,  
hey Mickey (huff huff) hey Mickey (huff huff)  
Oh Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind,  
hey Mickey (huff huff) hey Mickey_

I finished and everyone--excecpt for Edward, again-- burst into applause. I blushed and scurried up to change back into my regular clothes.

I descended the stairs and Edward was still in his stiff, angry position that he was in through the whole song. I hestitantly went to sit next to him.

As soon as i hit the cuchion he turned to me and asked" Who's Mickey???"

Thats what this was about?? I rolled my eyes. " Edward it was just a song. I dont even know anyone named Mickey..." Well, excecpt for Mickey mouse but that doesent count here.

"You sure??" he asked, searching my face to check if i was lying.

" No.... I'm not sure i just think i dont know anyone named Mickey" , I said sarcastically," Edward seriously it was the only song i knew on that thing, thats why i picked really dont think i would pick someone with the name 'Mickey'" i said the name with disgust, "over 'Edward' do you??"

He seemed to relax then and smiled at he slouched down to his original ,comfortable position, and wrapped his arm around my waist, sighing with contenment.

" Oh no you dont, Edward" Alice called," your up next."

Edward groaned and slowly got up


	4. Chapter 4

AN: This is the next installment of my story... i kinda got off track of where i was going with this since its been so long...this is probably OOC and idk if any u will actually enjoy it,... but just be thankful i actually got one out. So yea i should probably tell u people that i dont really like Twilight anymore... at all . So it will probably be more of a parody from now on. If it wasnt already... but anyway enjoy this chapter if u can cuz there prob wont be many more where this came from...( has anyone noticed how many times i used "probably" or "prob"?)

BPOV:

Edward walked up to the make-shift stage all cocky-like. when he reached it he reached behind it and randomly pulled out a leather jacket. Don't ask me where that came from. Maybe its some vampire voodoo or something...

He Smirked, selected a song and pushed play without hesitation. The bass pulsed through us immediately . I didn't recognize it at all. I cocked my head to the side and settled in for the show.

(INSERT FIRST VERSE OF "too Sexy" HERE )

I still didn't understand what song it was... until the chorus started.

' I'm too sexy for my shirt. too sexy for my shirt. so sexy it huuurts..'

I stared at Edward confusedly- as was the rest of his family- as he began dancing around on the stage. If you could call what he was doing dancing. He was doing what I refer to as the 'Mr. Bean ' Dance. its when a person would stand and put theirs thumbs into their belt loops, and move their hips back and forth at strange angles with the four fingers not in their pants flailing out each time your hips move.

He then began twirling around with his right finger wagging in the air and his left hand on his hip.

He sang the song through without any interruptions. Probably 'cause everyone was disturbed into silence. No one thought Mr. sophisticated over here to be doing such -to put it frankly- lame dancing.

When he was finished he face us again. Then he did something as unexpected as it was corny. He licked his finger and touched it to his behind making as 'SSSS' sound. Then ripped his shirt off. Indicating , I suppose, that he was indeed too sexy for his shirt. He waved said shirt around above his head, then did one more twirl around for good measure.

He stopped abruptly in a very 'Napoleon Dynamite' move. he stared at us then rushed off the stage, struggling to put his shirt back on , before he was sitting back next to me.

I glanced at him and noticed his shirt was on backwards. I didn't hesitate to point this out to him.

I guess I must have said it harsher than I thought 'cause his eyes filled with unshedable tears . For some reason he seemed very emotional today. Strange.

The family and I watched in concern as he sniffed and tried to pull his arms out of his shirt to change it around again.

When he couldn't get his one arm out of it he began jerking at it as if it would magically free his appendage.

" Um..." Carlisle cleared his throat. " Would you like some help, son?"

" No", Edward replied his voice choked up ," No I ... can.. do this ...myself..."

But it turns out he couldn't .

He had another drastic mood swing and was suddenly furious. " Stupid shirt ! Why must everything be so dang difficult!"

the next thing ya know the shirts lying on the ground, everyone staring at it. Edward then reached behind him and pulled out a pistol-vampire voodoo again perhaps? He shot repeatedly at the shirt on the floor screaming, " Take that you pathetic piece of Cotton!"

He stood for a moment, staring at what he had done , before he sat down with a huff, crossing his arms over his chest and scowling at the garment on the floor.

The Cullen's and myself stared wide-eyed at y the sulking 17/100 something year old vampire. I wasn't quite sure how exactly to react to this. I had no idea that he could act like this...and to be honest it was a bit of a turn-off. well, on the plus side, f i ever got turned I wouldn't miss having children that would eventually turn into teenagers... i got my own right next to me , glaring at a piece of clothing. A small chuckle escaped my mouth at my humor that pretty much only i found funny.

at the sound, though, Edwards head turned slowly in my direction, lower lip trembling just slightly.

"Are you laughing at me?", he asked.

my eyes widened in alarm. _Oh crap he thinks that my amusement is at his expense. Well it kinda is but... but why does he have to cry about it? Gosh, he's such a girl_.

I shook my head," No...I... uh I...Who's next?" i asked looking around the room to avoid further eye contact with Edward.

Alice spoke up, "Uhh... Bella .. maybe.. maybe we shouldn't do this anymore...you know i don't I can handle watching clothes that took _hours to pick out_ " she glared at Edward meaningfully," go through another...outburst.

I shrugged. I didn't really want to play in the first place.

I quickly got up to help Alice, who was already half way done, put the karoke machine away. Suddenly, Alice stood straight up , looked off into space for a bit , then sighed exasperatedly. Before i could ask the question of what she had seen the door suddenly banged open.

Edward growled. Rosalie hissed. Emmet chuckled. I gasped.

"Jacob...?"


End file.
